I Thought I Fixed My Food Issues...
Today's post is a day later than I intended but the reason it's late is related to the topic. I restarted the GAPS Intro Diet on Monday so my energy has been low, my brain has been foggy, and I've had headaches half the days. I had so much of my heart to share but the words just couldn't make their way from my brain to the keyboard. If you've been following this blog for a while then you may know that our family has been following the GAPS diet since the summer of 2013. If you're newer to MORE, then you should definitely check out a few of my past posts on the topic. It may help give you insight into my food philosophy and my passion for helping women overcome their food issues.
I could NEVER have survived doing the GAPS Intro diet the first time without overcoming my food issues--let alone would I have considered doing it again now!
As I've talked about on here before, a program called Freedom Session helped me immensely. I didn't go into it to resolve my food issues; in fact, my main struggle was trusting other people. But by getting myself emotionally healthy, my food issues began to fade away. I finally loved myself, wanted to take care of myself, and was willing to make serious sacrifices to get our family healthy.
However, about 6 months ago, a shift started to happen. I stopped nursing my youngest child and my hormones went bonkers. My painful cystic acne returned with a vengeance--all over my back. I had a difficult time coping, I was tired, I was stressed, and I felt like a crazy person. My issues with blood sugar came back. I gained weight. I had terrible periods.
I felt like crap--not about my circumstances, I felt like crap about myself.
And what happens when a woman stops loving herself, is tired, stressed, and has 3 young kids to take care of? She stops taking care of herself. Even though that's exactly what I needed.
I started making poor food choices and it became a slippery slope. If I felt terrible anyway, I might as well eat whatever I wanted. I forced as much stamina out as I could to keep up with all of my commitments but I was exhausted and in pain almost every single day.
I feel terribly sad thinking about this.
But thankfully common sense kicked in one day when I was laying in bed sick and feeling like I was dying... I needed to do something. I needed to fix this. I could NOT suffer another week or another day. I tell women to live their best lives and here I was not taking my own advice.
That moment was what changed my thinking.
Because it's not our behaviour that causes our food issues. You know that, right? It's how we think. How we feel about ourselves and what we believe about food.
I made a commitment to myself that after our kitchen renovation was done, I would start the GAPS diet over again. I would put myself first before food. I would put my family first before my selfish desires.
I'm sure it was no coincidence either, but as I was preparing for this week, Isabel Foxen Duke's video training series was released. Her Stop Fighting Food videos were exactly what I needed to hear. I had forgotten that loving myself was the key to all of the positive behaviours in my life.
I stopped loving myself because of my acne and weight gain and crazy emotions. How ridiculous! But we've all done it, right?
We're all guilty of not loving ourselves, especially our bodies.
So today I am telling you what I needed to tell myself:
YOU ARE INCREDIBLE! YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! YOU ARE WORTHY! YOU WERE CREATED WITH AN IMPORTANT PURPOSE!
Because if there's one thing I've learned about my food issues, it's that the issue isn't really about food. The issue is about not loving my body 100%, exactly as it is, at any given moment.