The Proverbs 31 Mother (Part One)

I entered motherhood 4.5 short years ago. I have 2 boys and another baby on the way. I am in no way, shape, or form an expert, and I pray I never come off that way. I was weary about writing this piece on the Proverbs 31 mother, because I know how personal motherhood is to all of us--how easily we can become offended with this topic, and how quick to defensiveness we can get when someone disagrees with our parenting. I prayed hard before writing this that none of my words would cause shame or guilt and that God would speak into each mama’s heart the very love and inspiration they need. And I hope that through this piece God would change and renew my heart too. Motherhood is hard… Amen? I mean, knock you on your butt, kick you when you’re down, pull your hair out, make you cry, kind of hard.

My hardest days have been in motherhood. My absolute best, close to heaven, days have also been in motherhood. The parallels of this journey are not like anything I’ve ever experienced.


I love that God trusted us with his most precious creation. Naturally, with it being the biggest thing we will ever do, I love that it is gut-wrenchingly hard, because it’s the fastest way that God can change us and change the world.

I believe with this gift, it’s through God alone that we will find the answers on how to steward these tiny people. It’s through faithful prayer and study of his word that we will find that answers to where we need to go.

This doesn’t mean that we should throw out every parenting book or stop asking advice, but I do believe that we should “seek first the kingdom of God.”

Only God knows your children better than you do; only he holds the keys to their hearts.

God should be our partner in motherhood, the light to our path. He created these miracles and he has a big plan for them. He has entrusted us to help them with that plan, but only he can fulfill it.

So, as mothers, God should be the first one we go to when troubles arise, or when hearts are weary, or when heaven feels close to earth.

The bible is full of wisdom for parenting but I’m going to share with you 5 verses from Proverbs 31.

I love that God gave us a blueprint, a standard, a bar to live up to as women and mothers. It’s the prayer of my heart that I strive for this standard everyday.

Although I know I’ll fall short, I know it’s the heart God looks at. It’s not perfection we are after but progress. I pray this scripture inspires you and encourages you to go deeper as it does with my heart, and that we rise up to be the mothers God created us to be, to raise the children He entrusted us to have.

When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. Proverbs 31:21

This last year this verse has been taped on my window above my kitchen sink. It has carried me through some hard days--days where I felt that my husband and I had failed our children.

I love the assurance and trust she has with the lord. That in hard times she has no fear, because she knows to whom her children belong, and she knows who they serve as a family.

What a great reminder to not grow weary, to stay strong in our faith, to be a living example of what it looks like to fear not.

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. Proverbs 31:25

“Oh Lord cloth me with strength and dignity and help me to laugh at the days to come.” Motherhood can get the best of me, it can bring out my very worst. I love that image of being clothed in strength and dignity--that it’s something we put on.

It’s not our own strength, but God’s strength; it’s not our dignity, but his.

I believe it’s easy to become tough in this world, but hard to become strong (there is a difference.) One can jade us or callous our spirit, whereas the other can grow our spirit.

I don’t believe it’s our job to toughen up our children to withstand a fallen world. It’s our job to strengthen our children to change a fallen world.

Every time I go through a hard time with God, I feel like I inherit a new piece of armor--that he literally clothes me with his strength. As mothers, we need to put on God’s strength daily, in order raise up a generation that is not tough, but strong.

I looked up the definition of dignity and this is what it says: “the state or quality of being worthy of honor or respect.” This makes my heart swell.

As mothers, we are to be clothed in honor and respect. Are we raising children who are learning to honor and respect us? Do they see their fathers living that example? Do they see us living up to that call of duty, clothing them with honor and respect?

I pray that we can be women who not only cloth our families with honor and respect, but also the stranger we pass by, the person who we would rather judge, and the person in the mirror looking back at us. What a living example that will truly be.

I think adding “she can laugh at the days to come” just hits the nail on the head. Sometimes we can take things so seriously. All of the demands on our lives can be overwhelming and we forget to have fun with our kids. We forget to remember what’s truly important.

I pray that you enjoy those babies of yours, that you can laugh in the midst of the chaos, and remember what a privilege motherhood really is.

- Kirista

[Read Part Two here.]

IdentityKirista Berry